Dancing the Lambada in Limbo

What does one do when one does nothing but 'do'? And other elongated statements lacking profundity.

GLAND ROCK RETURNS! This year Champagne Justice, Strong Island Recordings & Creation for Causes team up for the one day charity fest in aid of the Feel Yourself Campaign at the Wedgewood Rooms and Edge of The Wedge. Come and enjoy incredible live music, raffle prizes and stalls selling food, records and an assortment of other goodies.

TICKET ARE ON SALE NOW FOR A MERE £10. There is no age limit but under 14’s must be accompanied by an adult.

The 2013 line up included the likes of Esben and The Witch, Wild Smiles, Traams, The Hundredth Anniversary, Bloodsport, Fever and Shudder Pulps + more.

This year we’ve moved it forward and we have quite the line-up for you…

Hailed by NME as “the best shoegaze band ever”, Creation Records superstars The Telescopes’ first release was a split with fellow UK legends and recent All Tomorrow’s Parties curators Loop. Seven albums in, The Telescopes are nowhere near finished expanding their supreme, visceral, spaced-out amalgamation of noise, space rock, dream pop and psychedelic music. Their influences range from Suicide to The Velvet Underground to The 13th Floor Elevators, yet their sound is in its own dark galaxy. Counting Portishead among their many fans and currently featuring members of The Brian Jonestown Massacre and LSD & The Search For God, we are proud to welcome The Telescopes’ awesome noise to Gland Rock.

“A visceral exercise in harshly constructed noise.” – (Drowned in Sound)

“Transcends psychedelia, truly ‘breaking through’ in to the realms of space rock, a perfect accompaniment to the cloying dystopia of novels such as Brave New World or Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep.” – (Far Out Magazine)

“As we no doubt have mentioned before, folks into the current crop of psych/space rock, who dig folks like White Hills, Carlton Melton, Wooden Shjips, etc., who somehow haven’t heard the Telescopes, well, shit, it’s never too late, and odds are you’re have another new favourite band, and loads of records to track down” – (Aquarius Records)

On their cover of ‘Black Eyed Dog’: “brilliant - more like a whisper about an idea of a Nick Drake cover than anything else. And isn’t that really what a good Nick Drake cover should be?” (The Wire)


}}}GOD DAMN{{{
Sometimes you just lose your shit and everything is a blur. This is the world of God Damn. Furious, raging and roaring into a lathered, hairy mess of rocking destruction, they are party animals to some, pummelling titans of thrash to others. God Damn are damaged deities ready to slap your brothers and knock up your mothers.

“A rip-rollocking thrash; brutally mixing grunge and the regions finest export, heavy metal” – (NME)



CLAW MARKS have been busy since their recent inception, touring with The Fat White Family, having their debut EP ‘05:19AM GONE WEIRD’ on Sexbeat Records sell out almost immediately and generally having a blast annihilating audiences.

Claw Marks are like Fucked Up at their most exciting but with a hefty dollop of The Cramps’ weirdo sleaze thrown in for good measure. They’re quite possibly the grizzliest band in the UK right now and they’re going to be kicking arses all over the place. EXCITED!

‘Batten down the hatches and fetch the earplugs; we might have found the UK’s most exciting new punk band.’ - (NME)


Playlounge are one scuzzed up couple of men. Fuzzier and warmer than an angora jumper, with more sweat resultantly pouring out of every crevice, Playlounge are one of the most exciting bands strutting across the land right now. Unsurprising that they should share label space with the likes of the excellent Nai Harvest and get write ups like this:

“Playlounge are done playing around. Four years after forming, the London noise-pop duo’s debut album ‘pilot’ is here at last, released on April 14 via Brighton indie imprint Dog Knights Productions. Fuzzier than your head the morning after a twelve hour whiskey rampage, with none of the regret but some of the strange mystery bruises, it’s full of breakneck punk rhythms, distortion-slathered guitars and no-fi snarl right out of the No Age and Japandroids school of scuzzy excellence. Don’t believe us? Try ‘zero’ on for size.” – (The NME)


AK/DK are two men at the forefront of dynamism. Each sat at a drum kit, surrounded by keyboards, pedals and incendiary electronic equipment, they fuse to form an incredible boredom tonic that tides over one’s face like an uncorked stream of bottled joy. If neo-feudal was a genre name – and thank the lord it isn’t – they would be tearing it up and lambasting it while saluting the likes of Lightning Bolt on their way into the cosmos to get Valhalla dancing. One of the highlights of the most recent Southsea Fest, remixes for The Physics House Band and Stornoway have further illustrated AK/DK’s myriad talents. You don’t get to support The Dandy Warhols on their European tour without being a bit special.


Omi Palone are one of the UK’s most exciting bands right now, with their debut release out on two of the UK’s most exciting labels (Faux Discx and Negative Space). Omi Palone represent indie rock’s lost soul, wrapped up in a shadowy veil of warm post-punk. They are a charming, bewitching and motoring group who make are bound for big things and we are delighted to have them at Gland Rock 2014.

“This is rock music that remains challenging, fresh and vital, and wouldn’t be seen dead anywhere outside the scuzzy clubs and backrooms where it belongs.” – (Drowned In Sound)

“With a sound that nods to 80s Kiwi labels Flying Nun and Xpressway, some of the current Aussie punk scene and a lethargic Dinosaur Jr., Omi Palone have concocted a recipe that proves themselves punk/grunge stalwarts. The noise produced is rich, controlled, sepia toned and although some may argue it lacks diversity, the absence of a spectrum of nuances gives more weight to the precisely sculptured shape of the self titled début.” – (The Line of Best Fit)


No one likes the smell of burnt hair, right? Well what if it stank of love? How does one define the stench of love? Ask Human Hair. Comprising members of Claw Marks, Paradise and (the much missed) Lovvers, their raw, twisted sound is as beguiling as it is off-kilter. Ferocious, catchy and downright nasty in equal measure, Human Hair will be tearing scalps off to check what lies beneath.

“Sitting somewhere between The Saints - Gun Club…and the best of first wave ‘77 punk, plus their own spooky, unique brand of heavy skronk. Basically it’s hard to describe, so let’s just resort to simple adjectives like awesome and mind-blowing … Human Hair are possibly the most underrated act to emerge from in recent revival in the UK’s indie-punk-rock scene with the likes of Male Bonding, Fair Ohs, Mazes gaining much deserved attention it’s time for Human Hair to get some hard earned accolades. They’re also one of the finest live bands you are ever likely to catch on the London circuit.” – (Sex Is Disgusting).


With a voice as likely to stir as melt, Eloise Keating creates ambient, electronic dream-pop. With jovial, tropical beats, brooding keys and atmospheric rhythms casting a shadow underneath Eloise’s powerfully enchanting vocals, it’s not hard to see why the likes of Rob Da Bank, Line Of Best Fit, BBC 6 Music’s Tom Robinson and Amazing Radio have all taken notice of the promising songstress.

“A strong début that showcases the young songwriter’s vocal and musical ability, as well as her burgeoning understanding of true composition” – (Line Of Best Fit)

“Eloise’s alluring tones wrapping themselves around a backing that includes the unusual addition of a steel drum sound, an instrument that usually has connotations of carnivals, summer and tropical jovial pop” – (Breaking More Waves)

“’Be My Ghost’ shows great promise and is imbued with a languid grace, that conjures up a Lana Del Rey meets Daughter meets Lucy Rose kind of vibe.” – (The VPME)

“Showing off the same kind of morbidly insightful maturity as a young Laura Marling, Keating sets her sights on failed love” – (DRUNKEN WEREWOLF)


Portsmouth psychedelic thrash outfit Ricktyfitts formed only last August but are already proving to be one of the best new live acts in the UK with their blistering, fuzz-filled live sound.

Having been asked to play Southsea Fest on the strength of their debut show, featuring on Strong Island Recordings’ first compilation and an EP out on Portsmouth’s most famous record store Pie & Vinyl on Record Store Day, Rickyfitts are garnering high praise and fandom from all who encounter them. Expect big things from this ferocious duo.


Curxes are fucking bombastic. The Portsmouth/Brighton duo (Roberta Fidora /Macaulay Hopwood) are a powerhouse combo who gracefully smash their way across the stage like the prettiest wrecking ball you could imagine. Highlighted for their talents by, among others, The Guardian and Clash Music, Curxes brand of blitz-pop is a delightfully dark, densely structured force to be reckoned with.

“This exciting duo – Roberta Fidora and Macaulay Hopwood – have released a gutsy first record, with a brazen and chaotic sound. They describe themselves as “a decorative set of bones, channelling the ghosts of discothèques past.”” – (The Guardian)

“Curxes though, seem to know what it’s like to be alienated. The much hyped group recently stepped in to remix CHVRCHES, while their own material displays an admirable blend of light/shade, sweet/sour. New cut ‘Avant-Guarded’ is a case in point. More than just a neat pun, it fuses a sense of darkness to an inherent pop touch.” – (Clash Music)

“Curxes seem to create pop music twice the size as everyone else.” – (Bowlegs Music)

“‘Sparse synth pop and Siouxsie & The Banshees-style goth to create an industrial grind … has the melodrama of Twin Peaks turned into a spooky lullaby.” – (Brighton Source)

“Interesting and experimental … and, like all good music, is more than a little unhinged.” – (The VPME)


Stunningly uplifting and enthralling, Deluxe Flamingos are electropop in the amalgamated mould of Cut Copy, Apparat Organ Quartet, College, Chromatics and Fischerspooner. The sound is deluxe indeed; sumptuous, joyous and rendering their audiences impervious to the blissful trance that overtakes them. Succumbing to music is rarely this easy, rarely so effortlessly pleasurable. Having recently supported Nordic Giants and Waking Aida, Deluxe Flamingos have held their own at every turn and are fast becoming one of the most exciting new electropop bands around. Catch them on the ascent.



Wildest Dreams are the London-based two-piece of Holly Mullineaux on lead guitar/vocals and Zoe Mead on samples, synth and vocals. Despite their two-piece format, they make enough noise to rival their Shoegaze/dreampop counterparts, merging ambient loops and samples with electronic drum beats and dreamy guitar riffs. Emphasis is not just on noise alone, the songs resonate catchy rhythms, melodies, with a dark edge and an effortless charm that’s been praised among the likes of Warpaint, Wild Nothing and Still Corners.


‘It’s a spectral and melodic slice of dream pop that sounds akin to having your ears tickled by pixies at night’ (NME)

“There’s a charming innocence and prettiness about what they’ve recorded, without the songs ever becoming saccharine.” (Breaking More Waves)

Still strong contenders for the most grandiose name in the business, The Demons (for short) are a phenomenal sonic force…for good, for evil? Witness and discover. Having honed their incredible sound over the last decade or so, The Demons create a soundtrack for a sun-drenched megalithic era, dominated by underlying dark forces, enormous conflict and clandestine desert whispers. The Demons have shared billings with the likes of The MC5, Dead Meadow and Wooden Shjips, played as Damo Suzuki’s (Can) backing band and have had an album recorded by Steve Ansell (Blood Red Shoes). Their most recent release – on the mighty Cardinal Fuzz records – sold out immediately and can be found below. Few can rival their sound, few can match their intensity.

“‘Contact High’ is a mesmerizing spectacle. It’s the soundtrack to days spent on dust-ridden roads leading to nowhere and everywhere; it’s the sound of the world crawling to a halt, as the sun simmers on the horizon” – (Line Of Best Fit)


Here is some information about what we at Gland Rock are supporting:

‘The campaign was started by Maddie Wallace while she being treated for breast cancer. With no family history and no previous health problems, Maddie never bothered to check herself for lumps. Then one day she bumped into a friend – also a younger woman – who had just undergone chemotherapy for breast cancer, and that friend reminded Maddie how important it is to check yourself regularly. That probably saved her life.

Feel Yourself Campaign aims to promote awareness in younger men and women about the importance of checking for breast and testicular cancer. Both of these types of cancer are on the increase and catching them early is the key to successful treatment. Setting a reminder on your phone for a weekly check of your assets should not only be an essential part of your beauty or health regime, it could also save your life!’

Find out more at http://www.feelyourselfcampaign.org/

More info on the organisers:


The fabulous venue:


So, come one and all to the second instalment of Gland Rock, it’s gonna be a biggun. And remember to FEEL YOURSELF!


Is this the greatest music video that’s ever been made? I think it probably is.

Ravioli Me Away still baffles me as a name. Really couldn’t stand it initially. Thing is, fuck the name, this band is incredible. Tense Men agree, and they’re immense. British music is SO bloody good right now. Oh, yeah, fantastic video too, looks very much like The Cardiacs had some inspiration here. Makes sense, The Cardiacs are one of the finest bands this country has ever produced.

Here’s another track from ‘Contact High Wit Da Demons’ available on Cardinal Fuzz Records.

Following on from my last post, here’s a track from the frankly awesome ‘Contact High Wit Da Demons’ by You’re Smiling Now But We’ll All Turn Into Demons out now on Cardinal Fuzz Records.

You're Smiling Now But We'll All Turn Into Demons - Contact High 2XLP (Release Date 23rd June) [Cardinal Fuzz Records]

 You should totally buy this, whoever you are. These guys are fucking rad and one of the United Kingdom’s most enjoyable and exciting bands for the past decade

True fact.

Best. Footballer. Ever.

Lionel Messi is the greatest footballer ever. If England go out - and I fear they will - then I will be supporting Argentina, particularly Messi, purely so he can win the World Cup and put an end to those who doubt his credentials as the greatest ever footballer, which he undoubtedly is.


WRLD CP, my nw sggstn fr bnd nm

Collective Unconsciousness 7", by S.H.I.T.

This is fucking rad. It’s like Bad Brains got lost covering ‘Buzzbomb’ by the Dead Kennedys, forgot who they were and started panicking in Purgatory. Awesome.

Sparks endorse Mates Condoms.This ass ain’t big enough for the both of us.